How?Why?What?When?

Well this is exciting, first blog post on my first blog...hence the name of the Post. I am assuming that people will want to know what on earth is going on. HOW i came up with this god awful title, WHY i am writing a blog and WHY i came up with it, WHAT is this sausage roll i am referring to and WHEN did i decided to share my timely secrets of the sausage roll.

All will be revealed.

Firstly though, i must say i am not a "writer" or a "wannabe writer" (should those funny speech marks even go there???), i wouldn't even class myself as a blogger...even though i am writing a blog... so you must excuse me for poor writing skills, never making my i's big, simple vocab and an all round shocking blog. 
This blog is what i call a selfish blog... it is not really for the purpose of anyone else but myself. It is my way of monitoring my Sausage roll (most people won't give a poop about it) and how best to kill the sausage roll...but there may be some funny bits throughout the way.

Right so let me give a little bit of background for those who don't know about my sausage roll. Firstly it is not a term of endearment for my boyfriends willy, nor is it a tradtitional Greggs sausage roll (the don of all sausage rolls).

Yummmmm

It is in fact the loveable, squishy, blubbery bit that sits (looking like a sausage roll) on my lower stomach!

Now don't get me wrong i am a big believer in cushion for the pushin' but my sausage roll has been with me for too long now...and over time has grown... and therefore has become my enemy.

So now that all the gory details are out there i can explain my motive behind this blog: TO KILL THE SAUSAGE ROLL.

I plan to monitor my sausage roll, whilst attempting diets, star jumps, jogs (or more realistically)walks in the park, healthy picnics...with sausage rolls - NO that is naughty.... anyway you see where i am going with this... i am going to become my own sausage guru which will eventually lead to the death of the sausage roll!